Why it takes hours to do the dishes!

Why it takes Hours to do the Dishes!

Do you want to know why!?  Why it takes hours to do the dishes!  I’ll tell you why:  2 TINY HUMANS!

Have you ever started cleaning the kitchen in the morning and then reached lunch time and realised you’re still trying to clean the kitchen!?

Your partner comes home after a long day at work and you try and explain how busy your day was, but it looks like you’ve actually done nothing!?

You have clean washing hanging on everything and you slowly take off the items of clothes you need to use, but the mountain of dirty washing is growing faster than you are taking the clean washing down!? Seriously how is that even possible?

I know; surely I could be folding washing now instead of writing this while I sip on my second cold coffee for the day. But seriously those few odd socks that are left and a couple of zippys I know will be worn to bed tonight, are really not worth the energy. I could heat my coffee too, but I’m scared if I make any sudden movements, those 2 tiny humans will be at my feet again crying to be picked up. Or holding the same book out to me to read for what feels like the hundredth time this morning.

So why does is actually take more than 2 hours to wash the dishes? Right so the kids are happily playing in their kitchen and reading books, so I start rinsing out bottles from the morning…… “Eat!!!!”

If only I could put some bowls of breakfast in front of them and keep going. But first there has to be a debate about what they’re going to eat. And then when a decision has been made and I start making a vegemite sandwich and a peanut butter sandwich there’s a full melt down in the kitchen because now that’s not what they want anymore. Fast forward because no one want to hear about someone else’s kids crocodile tears…. sandwiches are on plates at the table, but now the vegemite sandwich will only be eaten if the little madam can sit on my lap…. at least Cole’s eating his sandwich without too many issues. I get 1/4 of a piece of bread into Norah and she’s not hungry anymore….

Finally I’m back in the kitchen, I’ve even managed to put the plugs in and start filling up the sinks….

“Hands!” Cole needs help to wash his hands. Easy fixed (once I’ve dried and sterilised (CF) my own). Cole’s hands are clean I can attempt to start the dishes….

“Poo” ok Norah’s done her first poo for the day. Awesome maybe she won’t need laxative this evening. Here’s the thing, changing a nappy isn’t as simple as changing a nappy. It involves the toddler that needs changing, running in the opposite direction to the clean nappy. I end up with 2 toddlers fighting over whether they should both be in the room together. Oh and they all of a sudden need a toy that’s 3 rooms away once I’ve finally got their pants off.

Right clean bum. Back in the kitchen…..

“Poo!” Cole’s turn. Go through the running away, fighting and needing toys they haven’t seen all morning for the second time.

Right clean bum back into the kitchen…..

This time I’ve managed to fill half the top of the dish drainer….

“Bunny, Mum find Bunny” Norah at my legs because she desperately needs Bunny and apparently she didn’t happen to see Bunny as she stepped over her and came to see me in the kitchen…. Dry, sterilise hands, get Bunny….. Water’s cold!

Refill the sink, continue washing the dishes. Finally getting somewhere….

Full wrestling in the kitchen because someone has looked at someone funny or someone has taken something or someone is breathing the same air as the other one. At this point I’ve given up understanding what is going on.

“Up, up, up” Now I have both kids crying at my feet.

Be smart Mumma, this is obviously not working. I set up painting with water at the table. No actual paint, only the smallest amount of water…. what could possibly go wrong!? Well let me tell you; I didn’t give them the pictures they wanted. No wait, I gave them the pictures that they asked for, but they changed their mind once they had them. Oh yeah and they both wanted the red paint brush. Not that it mattered because they were using water!!

Calm. Everyone’s painting. I’m doing the dishes. Still.

Nearly finished, we haven’t quite hit 2 hours, must be some sort of record.

‘Crying’
“Clean it up, clean it up”
The smallest amount of water that was left in Cole paint cup is now all over his jumper and the floor.

*Take a breath* clean up the water, continue with the dishes. Tell Norah for the 4th time that I will read her a story when I’m finished.

“Poo!” Norah. Again. This time they fight about whether the door should be open or closed. Of course Norah wants it open because Cole is closing it. Clean bum.
Finish the dishes…. finally

Oh man it’s only 10:30!

*Drinks cold Coffee*

If anyone ever asks you, “Why it takes hours to do the dishes!?”  just send them my way and I’ll be sure to tell them exactly why.